Thursday, January 9, 2014

A brand new, sparkly year!

2013 is gone.

Another year has passed.

It flew by so quickly.

I am beginning to realise, that from now on, most years will more then likely fly by very quickly.

I don't have any 'babies' left. I have 4 children. No more toddlers either, I am not needed as much anymore. They are growing up. They are more independent. They are smarter, quicker, and are growing more and more curious about the world everyday.

2013 was a mixture of emotions for me. I have grown a lot over the year.

I am grateful to myself that I managed to pick up on the unhappiness of my children at school, and managed to fix that for them. They have thrived since they realised 'mummy won't tolerate that'. They come to me if they have issues, because they know I will do all I can do fix them. They have also realised, that not every problem can be solved by mum, but sometimes they have to do some self-adjustment. I am glad they have learnt that skill.

I am realising that I am stronger then I ever thought I was. After Hubby had a very bad bout of Depression, and we have come out the other side of it. I am still up, I am still going. WE are still going.

The last photo of my mum with my children
I am very slowly coming to terms with my mothers passing. This will be something I feel I will be working on for many years to come. Sometimes, when it is quiet, or when something isn't going the way I want it to, I will shed a tear for the conversations that I can't have, with the person who was my best friend, my confidant, my advisor, and my counselor. I can't have that all consuming hug, that only a mother can give, that makes you feel like everything is going to be OK. But, I know in my heart, she is with me, and hugging me from wherever she is. This will take time, but I know it will happen. I know she would be proud of me, hubby and the children. I know she is watching them, and protecting them. This helps me to keep moving forward.

I am saddened by the news that we have been asked to leave our home. But I am able to see the light at the other side. A fresh new start. A fresh new home. For our beautiful family.

I was also saddened by the news of my Grandfathers passing. But, unlike my mothers death, I knew this one was coming. I think back to the beautiful things my 'Pop' used to do for me when i stayed at their place as a child. My favourite memory, is when it was Winter, he would lay out mine and my cousins PJ's in front of the fireplace to warm up for when we got out of the bath. He used to do this to his own PJ's too! He was such a 'cute' pop! Everyone called him Pop too. He took pride in his title. Even my cousins Football team had a team hat made for him, on the back, it said 'POP'. He was loved by all.

But most of all, I am feeling ready. Ready to face 2014. Ready for any new challenges. Ready to take ownership of who I am. Stand up for what I believe. Stand behind my children and let them go forward on their own, knowing I am only one step behind them at all times for support. Ready to embrace the future, and whatever it brings. I am determined to try harder at all that I do. Health and fitness, finances, child raising, being a wife, and being exactly who I am.

Get ready 2014.

I am here. 

I am alive. 

I am ready for you. 

2014 is a time for ....

 More Smiles!!

More Experiences!!

More FUN!!

 More night time cuddles!!

More Self acceptance.

Happy New Year 'SFK' readers xx

1 comment:

  1. 2014 sounds like a wonderful year for you all. I can't believe how quickly these years are going by either