Well, I just needed to get this off my chest, voice how I am feeling so it doesn't cripple me inside anymore.
I am lonely.
I have moved to a brand new state, and I know zero people. Recently there was a huge blow out with my 'family' that has been coming for years, and so now I have zero family members, and hubby is always working. Like, ALWAYS!
I have my children, of course. But sometimes all I wish for, is someone to invite me over for a coffee and a chat. A grown up chat! Not about child 1 wants a blue cup, but child 2 is already using the blue cup.
I was hoping that when the kids started school, I would be able to blend in to other mums conversations, and make some new friends. But I have found this difficult. I have gone so shy! I mean, I have never been not shy, but I have never been THIS shy. I am struggling. I need adult interaction, I miss my husband, and I miss my mum. She was always there for me to talk to. Now she has gone, there is no one. I have no confidant, I have no vent, hubby doesn't want to hear it after his long days, and I don't blame him, and try not to bother him with it. But it's becoming a plain old fact, that I am lonely. My soul aches for all I have lost. My heart aches for the love of something not there anymore. And my head aches from having to deal with children who are coping with loss and change as well.
This is my rant, and I don't mean to offend anyone, I love each and every one of you who follow me, and takes the time to comment and help me when I need it. But sometimes, a face to face conversation is worth a million likes.